The Imp & The Pimp, Part 2 of 10

(Men grunting)

Victor: "HAH!"

Loser: "SEVEN HELLS!"

Joffrey: "Barbaric!"

Tyrion: "Brilliant!"

Tyrion: "Come nephew, let us belly up to the bar!"

 Bar Fly: "So I says to Red Malik, I says..." 

 Bar Fly: "...this one ain't worth our trouble, but 'er sister on the other hand..."

 Tyrion: "Excuse me, barkeep!"

Tyrion: "I'd like two drinks, my good man."

Tyrion: "One for me..."

Tyrion: "...and one for my nephew here. It is his sixteenth nameday!"

Barkeep: "Alright then, what'll it be?"

Joffrey: "Give me a glass of Dornish summerwine."

Barkeep: "Don' 'ave any."

 Joffrey: "Arbor Gold, then."

Barkeep: "Don' 'ave that, either."

Joffrey: "Surely you carry Myrish sour red!"

Barkeep: "Nope."

Tyrion: "Perhaps you can save us all the headache and tell us what you do serve."

SFX: Clack!

Next week: Joffrey's first drink!

18 days...