Fantasy Football XXII: Ravens vs Patriots

New England shall return to the Superbowl...nevermore.

13 days...

Snowetry II

Oh the weather outside's delightful,
80° Christmas makes me spiteful,
Where'd the Winter weather go?
Why no snow? Why no snow? Why no snow?

Other hits from "It's a Very Climate-Change Christmas!"
Rocky the Snowman
Here Come Sandy's Floods
It's Beginning to Look Like Something That Vaguely Resembles Christmas
Walking in a Perennial Summer Wonderland
I'm Dreaming of a Beige Christmas

17 days...

Snowetry

32 days...

The Little Spider

A Little Spider skitters along the dusty floor,
Through the haunted manor halls and the banshee's moor,
Because the Spider finds
That the web he winds
Lends grim glee to all Hallow's Eve decor.

 12 days...

The Roaming Spirit

For my girlfriend, Heather, who loves Halloween and traveling. Inspired very much by Marc Davis' hitchhiking ghosts.

25 days...

Chades Challenge LXIII: Explosive Stockings

Santa fills stockings with yummy chocolaty sweets,
But the Grinch prefers his packed with nastier treats.
"What surprise lays in store for little Cindy and Tom...
When they get a taste of my green tannenBOMBS!"

As always, everyone is invited to participate in the Chades Challenge. If you have any designs for "Explosive Stockings," let me know and I'll post them below. Otherwise you can join in December 23rd for...

Chades Challenge LXIV: Jolly Dragons! 

Colleen "The Rocking Stocking" Madden

Guillermo "Slim Dickens" Martinez

16 days...

The Halloween Tree

As I mentioned in a previous post, I have a tradition of giving my mom a decoration for her Halloween Tree (which was made by my brother) every year, for her Birthday.

This year, the card itself was a decoration. Christmas Trees have tree-toppers, so I figured my mom's Halloween Tree deserves nothing less. And what better Halloween icon than the Jack-O-Lantern?

You can see some of the previous years' decoration/presents above. It was my step-dad Steve's birthday, too, so he got some wine with a Halloweeny skull-bottle-stopper.

On the other side of the card was the limmerick:

The witches are singing from brooms in the sky

While every ghost calls with voices on high

Rather than "Boo!"

It's "Happy Birthday, you two!"

Then they dig into their pumpkin pie.

I may just use my mom's Halloween Tree as inspiration for this week's Chades Challenge: Wicked Trees!

14 days...

Happy St. Patty's Day!


To all you artists who follow this blog,
Heed well my warning while sippin' yer grog!
To avoid a good pinch,
You should cover each inch,
With clothes green as the moss on a log!

According to last week's blog poll, you folks agree (or a majority of you, anyway) that The Green Dragon is the best St. Patrick's Day drinking song. So here it is for your viewing enjoyment!

And just so my fellow Scots don't feel left out on this uber-Irish holiday, Slainte mhor agus a h-uile beannachd duibh, cousins!

31 days...

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas Eve, technically, but for obvious reasons, I won't be blogging tomorrow. Unfortunately, I don't have everyone's addresses, so I'll have to post your Christmas card here.

You can even choose a painting for the inside of your card. If you're a Star Wars nerd, let's say I painted this scene on the inside of your card...

If you're a Calvin and Hobbes fan, and want your own personalized snowman gag, how about this for the inside of your unique, personal card?

Then again, if you're a man after my own reptilian heart, I'd have probably sent you your very own Micro Rex painting. And if you went on a Hawaiian vacation (like my dad, who the actual card is for), all the better!

Finally, for those gamers out there (whether you're chaotic naughty or lawful nice), here's one I did for our gaming group, The Dandies. The incomparable Emma did the original sketch a long time ago, I just plopped the santa hats on.

Twas the fight before Christmas,

And all through the dungeon,

Not a creature was stirring,

Cuz they'd been savagely bludgeoned.

Or, if you just don't like cards, how about a festive ornament? This one's for my cousin Tracy's new baby Blake (not to be confused with her sister Kelli's new baby Jack Jack). The Madison clan's getting bigger all the time!

"Ooh...the CLAUS!"

1 day...but I'm not blogging tomorrow, so I'll say it now:

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from Windsor

While gathering Shakespeare reference for this Christmas card to a friend (who hopefully doesn't read this blog too regularly), I found some excellent seasonal poetry. Here they are, for any of you Shakes fans out there.

At Christmas I no more desire a rose
Than wish a snow in May's new-fangled mirth;
But like of each thing that in season grows.
-Love's Labour Lost

Blow, blow, thou winter wind,
Thou art not so unkind
As man's ingratitude;
Thy tooth is not so keen,
Because thou art not seen,
Although thy breath be rude.
Heigh ho, sing heigh ho, unto the green holly;
most friendship is feigning, most loving mere folly:
Then, heigh ho, the holly!
This life is most jolly.

Freeze, freeze, thou bitter sky,
That dost not bite so nigh
As benefits forgot:
Though thou the waters warp,
Thy sting is not so sharp
As friend remember'd not.
Heigh ho, sing heigh ho, unto the green holly:
most friendship is feigning, most loving mere folly:
Then, heigh ho, the holly!
This life is most jolly.
-Heigh Ho, The Holly

5 days...

TALES FROM LONDON:

Chapter III: The Nose

Another story started with a sentence from Vi: "Shirley's nose was growing all the time." Nine syllables? Sounds like the start of a limerick to me.

Shirley's nose was growing all the time,

Her need for kleenex caused a life of crime.

The grocers she'd rob,

Would chase her and sob,

"That tissue's no match for your slime!"

"Huntress"


Cruising through an azure field
Visage grim with scars half-healed
Huntress of the darkened deeps
Silently she stalks and reaps

Faintly now, she feels a tickle
On her nose, the slightest prickle
Blood and sweat like caramel
Splashes ring like dinner bells

Far above, the huntress spies
A silhouette against the sky
Furious is her ascent
Tail churning as gills vent

Teeth roll forth, all set to bite
Eyes roll back, a milky white
The sea erupts 'neath swimming prey
Huntress flies through crimson spray

Jaws lock, flesh rends, the screams begin
Sea swells, blood wells, the screaming ends
Down she pulls her fresh attack
Shark and man, into the black.

Choose Your Own (Drawing) Adventure

The idea behind the Choose Your Own (Drawing) Adventure is for people to vote on the story they'd like to illustrate. This week's winning concept was:

"Once, there was a baby-stealing goblin who sailed the seven seas so he could make an award-winning documentary."

I wonder what the goblin's film was about. I saw a few art films at CalArts that looked like they were made by goblins, but I'd hardly call any of them award-winning.

Coursing through the waters red

With golden sun above their heads
Laughing as the baby cries
Goblins green, with bulging eyes

In their wake, the mothers wail
As on the shore they shout and flail
Alas, their infants' fates are sealed
For baby's goblins' favorite meal

Let me know if you partook in this week's challenge, and I'll post your design along with these other tyke-taking terrors:

Vi-Dieu Nguyen

Trip Park

Next week's challenge, to be posted Friday, Sep 11th:

"Once there was a pink kitten who made a deal with the devil so he could avenge his parents' death."

BRINGIN' REXY BACK

According to Science Daily, scientists have confirmed the remains of biochemical material (proteins) in dinosaur fossils. T. rex fossils, no less! This organic material has survived for sixty-eight million years; I think this is proof that God wants us to bring the dinosaurs back. I am so excited by this news, I was inspired to write a haiku.

Rain-slicked poncho blue
Primordial forest green
Stain on pants yellow

Speaking of inspirational new stuff, there's some awesome new music out there by Weird Al and Regina Spektor. Weird Al's new song, CNR, is a JibJab exclusive, though it's already on YouTube. I was shown the CNR video by my buddy Raph, who is an exact doppleganger of the ill-fated fellow at the video's 1:42 mark. Raph's adopted, so he may just have an identical twin out there!

JibJab's Alan Cook:


Pixar's Raphael Suter:

Uncanny, eh? Kudos to my friends and fellow CalArts alumni Amanda and Justin, and everyone else at JibJab for keeping up the inspiring work!

The other song I was inspired by is Regina Spektor's new single, Laughing With. I'm one of those people who would check both the box for God and evolution in my "What do you believe?" poll. So I'm greatly inspired by anything God-or dino-related.

Laughing With begs the question, why do people only laugh at God when they don't need to depend on Him? It's one of the more profound songs I've heard in a great while, so I thought I'd share it with you all (regardless of which boxes you select in my poll).

The thing I love about dinosaur artists is that they feel very deeply about their work. Here's a poem from artist Douglas Henderson.

Stooped weary over outlined forms,
To bring alive on paper blanks,
Extinguished zoos I miss and mourn,
That give me not a single thanks.

Cold their hearts those ancient saurs,
That proofed the world with reptile stare
And if regarded from afar,
Could something be more unaware?

This reverie of deepest time,
May prove a Recent dream absurd,
Wandering in doodled pine,
In hopes of fetching some warm word.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood. I set up a toll booth and charged for both.